Therapy
by PieceOfShit96
Summary: A little boy comes into Adi's hospital whose story hits a little close to home for her.
1. Chapter 1

Adi saw the boy coming in on a stretcher and her heart dropped. He could only have been 7 or 8; he was battered and bloody, shaking and crying as they wheeled him in.

"Hey, Dr. Driftwood. Uh...We found this kid along the street...He...He ran away from his parents...They apparently did this to him. Can you take care of him? The other ER doctor is tied up, and I know it's not really your department, but..."

"I've got him, yeah." She slowly approached the bed. The boy jumped back, whimpering as he still shook. "Shhhh...It's okay buddy. It's okay. We're gonna take care of you, okay?"

"I...H...Hurt...So much..."

"Oh, sweetie. I'm sure you do. We're gonna make you feel better, okay?"

"Please don't hurt me...Please..."

"No, no. I promise honey. Some of the things we have to do may hurt, but we won't hurt you intentionally. I promise." Adi held out her pinky finger. "I pinky swear."

The boy sniveled, accepting her promise.

"I'm gonna take your shirt and pants off, is that okay?"

"No! No please no don't do that to me!" His sobs redoubled.

"Shhh. Sweetie, it's okay. We just want to check you out. We just want to see where you're hurt..."

"Nooo...The...The thing Daddy does hurts so much...He takes my clothes off and h...hurts me..."

"Honey, I promised I wouldn't hurt you, remember?"

"R...Right...Okay..."

As Adi examined him, she couldn't help but let her mind wander to her man. She wondered if Otis was this scared at his age. The boy was almost identical. He was being abused- apparently sexually, as well. He wasn't albino, his hair wasn't shorn as Otis had said his was- on the contrary, his hair was long and matted from the lack of care.

Once they got him stabilized, they gave him the full work up- X-rays, a CAT scan, and once he was sedated- a rape kit.

As she left the slumbering little boy to go home to her survivor, she sighed. She didn't want to leave him, but she needed to get home to Otis.

Otis had been struggling lately. It wasn't surprising to her; thirteen years of being brutally abused and assaulted will certainly leave its scars. Mostly, he was relatively fine, but every once in a while he slipped into a depression, which usually resulted in him struggling with his weight. She felt horrible for him when he was like this. She couldn't imagine the emotions and trauma he still had from his childhood...Guilt, anger, fear, regret... He had never had the opportunity to work through them, and he vehemently denied her suggestions to go to therapy or a counselor. He became withdrawn, much quieter than usual, and much less social. That is, if you could call Otis social in any situation.

Apparently, these episodes happened with a drastically decreased frequency since he and Adi had been together, but they still happened every once in a while. She knew he had helped him, but she couldn't fix all of his problems just with her love.

When she arrived home, he was curled up to his pillow like he always was in her absence. It was early in the evening, though- around the time the family would be eating- and he was sleeping.

"Sweetie..." She murmured sweetly, stroking his back. He stirred, whimpering in protest.

"Hey, mama..." He groaned, stretching.

"How are you doing today?"

"I'm fine..." Stubborn as always, Otis denied that anything was wrong, especially during one of his episodes.

"Okay. That's good." She kissed a stubbled cheek. "Have uh...What'd you do today?"

"Were you just going to ask me if I've been out of bed today?" He squinted at her. She wasn't sure if the expression was because he had just woken up, or if he was irritated.

"Well...Y-yeah..."

"I'm not fucking depressed, Adi." He grumbled, burrowing into his pillow. The dichotomy of his statement and action made her chuckle. He glared over his shoulder. "Worked on 3 cars with Rufus today. Exhausted."

"I bet, honey..." She stroked his hair, pulling it over his shoulder in a white cascade. "I bet dinner's almost ready. You gonna come join us?"

"No..."

"Babe..."

"I'll work on a sculpture or somethin'."

"Otis, you haven't eaten in days."

"Yes I have! Rufus and I went down to the diner today and ate lunch."

"Mm-hm. What did you have?"

"A burger and cheese fries. Even stole some of Rufus's fries."

"And did you keep it down?"

"...Yeah..."

"Otis."

He sighed. "No..." He shifted. "Didn't think you'd ask..."

"Seriously? HOW long have we been together?"

"Shut up."

Sighing, she rubbed circles in his back gently. "I love you, sweetie."

"I love you, too."

"I'm going to go down and eat. Are you coming?"

He shook his head.

"Baby..."

"No."

"Okay. Okay." She knew better than to argue, and left him.

After dinner, she walked back up to their room with a plate of food. Dammit, she was going to get that mule to eat.

She found him sitting at his desk, staring blankly at a white canvas.

"Baby?"

He sighed, running his hand through his hair. "Er...Maybe...Maybe you are right...Maybe...I...I'm a little not okay..." He swallowed heavily, looking down at his hands.

"Sweetie..." She stroked his hair, then kissing his cheek. "I know. And It's okay."

"It just...It just happens sometimes..." He pinched the bridge of his nose.

She sat, stroking his back in silence for a moment.

"You know...I think I may have something that would make you feel better."

His shoulders slumped and he shook his head. "Adi, I told you I...It took me long enough to tell you, I'm not talking about this to someone I don't know-"

"No, no. I know...This little boy came in today...His mother and father beat him...And after we did a rape kit, we found out that he had been sexually abused too...He's so scared, honey...And I think it would help both of you if you went in and talked to him."

"Huh?"

"He's terrified...I think it would be good for him to see someone on the other side of it. To show that you can get through it. And you of all people would know what he would need and want. You've been through it. I think it would be really good for him to have someone he can talk to about it that know's what he's going through."

"How do you think that would help me?" He quirked an eyebrow.

"Don't you think it would make you feel better to help someone? To be who you always wanted someone to be when you were a little boy?"

"Doesn't change what happened to me...OR what happened to him."

"No, but you can take some of the pain away."

"Mmm...Alright...I'll go talk to him."

"You hungry?" She asked, pushing the plate of food into his stomach.

"No..."

"Otis, you have to eat something."

"I did eat something today."

"You ass."

"Fine, fine..." He begrudgingly took the plate from her and ate.


	2. Chapter 2

When Adi went in to see the little boy the next day, she almost didn't recognize him. The hair that had hung in dirty matts almost to his waist was entirely gone, now only a slight fuzz was on his head. He was curled in a ball, tears rolling down his face.

"What's the matter, sweetie? Are you in pain?" She asked.

"Th...They took my hair..." He whimpered.

"Ohh, sweetie...It'll grow back. It was all dirty and knotted."

"It was the only thing Mommy and Daddy said was good about me...Now no one will ever love me!"

"No, honey. That's not true. That's not true." She reached to stroke his face and he flinched away, crying out in alarm. "Shhhh... It's okay. Remember I promised we'd never hurt you?"

"It hurt when they cut my hair! It...It felt like they were ripping it out!"

"Ohh, honey. Can I see your head?"

"Mm...I g...guess so..."

Sure enough, big welts were rising on the little boys head. She imagined it was where the clippers had pulled on a knot. "It'll be better in a few minutes, honey. Hey, you're gonna have a very special visitor today."

"W..Who?"

"My husband!" She proclaimed gleefully. The little boy fidgeted, looking uncomfortable. "He went through the same thing you did when he was a kid."

"R...Really?" He peered at her.

"He did. And he's been really sad lately. Do you think you could cheer him up? Maybe making someone happy will make you feel better!"

He smiled shyly. "Maybe..." He cocked his head. "You...You mean I'm not alone?..."

"No, honey. I know what happened to you is horrible, but so many other kids have gone through it too."

He hung his head. "I'm sad for them...But it's nice to know I'm not weird..."

"No, sweetie. You're not. You're very, very special." She smiled sweetly, stroking what was left of his hair.

Around lunch time, Otis wandered in to her office. "Hey, mama."

"Hey, sweetie!" She pecked him on the lips.

"Mmm. You're always so excited to see me." He said, smiling softly into her hair.

"Because I love my handsome, sexy, smart, wonderful man! Sooooo much!"

"You're so cute..." He said, squeezing her.

"You ready to go see him?"

"Yeah. How's he doing today?"

"He's okay. He's sad because they cut his hair. Otis, it was all in one big knot. We couldn't do anything with it...But he was crying about it."

"Mm..I know that feeling." He grumbled.

"I know, honey..." She kissed his cheek.

Otis entered the room slowly, letting Adi go ahead of him.

"Hey, honey! Remember I said you would have a visitor? He's here! This is Otis, my husband."

"Hey, buddy." Otis sat in front of him slowly. "How're you feeling today?"

The little boy blushed, suddenly bashful. "I...I feel okay..."

"Come on, buddy. Man to man. You don't have to be embarrassed in front of me. I went through the same thing, remember?"

The boy nodded, suddenly more confident. "I...I hurt. Did you hurt?"

Otis nodded. "I still hurt sometimes. But I never got fixed up like you are. I was stupid and never got anyone to patch me up."

"Why did they hit you?" The little boy asked.

"H...Huh?" Otis stammered. "I-I..." He felt Adi's hand on his back, warm and comforting, bringing him back down to earth.

"They hit me because they didn't want me...They said I was stupid and never should have been born...That they should just kill me and that I was worthless."

"None of that is true. None of it." Otis replied. He spoke with such conviction, it startled Adi. "Don't you let a single word they said leak into that brain of yours, kid. Because if you do , it'll rot your whole body. And it's not worth giving them another second of your life."

"Then why did they say it?"

"Because they're mean, awful people. Do you think good people would have hit you? Would have not fed you? Your parents are supposed to love you no matter what. And my parents didn't, and your parents didn't. Do you think my parents were good people for doing what they did to me?"

"No..."

"Then neither were yours. YOU are a good person. YOU can be a good person. The less like them you are, the better of a person you are. And you're NOTHING like them."

The little boy nodded, fidgeting with his blanket. "...I like your hair, mister..."

Otis snorted. "Thanks."

"They shaved mine off this morning."

Otis sighed. "I know buddy. I'm sorry. But you know what? It grows back. I didn't have long hair until I was 18. You know why?"

"No...?"

"Because see how white it is?" Otis asked. The little boy nodded. "See my eyes?"

"Whoa! They're red!"

"Yeah. That's why my parents hit me. Because they thought I was a freak. And because of that, my mom shaved my head. I had long hair when I was really little, like 3 or 4. Maybe 5, even. But then she thought that if she shaved my head, I would just look sick."

"You're not a freak, mister..." The little boy reached out to touch Otis's hair, but Otis flinched back. "I...I'm sorry...I know why you're flinching, though. I wouldn't hit you, mister. I wouldn't do that."

Otis smiled slightly. "I know buddy." He leaned closer, letting the boy touch his hair.

"Did you leave when you were 18?"

"No. I left when I was 13."

"Why did you wait so long to let your hair grow?" He asked, twirling Otis's locks in his hand.

"Because I let what they said get to me. I never had anyone to tell me it wasn't true."

"...Thanks, mister...You're makin' me feel better..." He hesitated a moment. "Do you have any scars?"

"Yeah." Otis took his cap off. "Give me your hand." The little boy obeyed, and Otis ran his tiny hand over the scars embedded on his scalp.

"Ow...I bet those really hurt..."

Otis shrugged. "Yeah..."

"Do they still hurt?"

"No, not anymore."

Otis felt the boy push his head down, and Otis obliged, then feeling the little boy press his lips to his head. Otis pulled away questioningly.

"Now they'll never hurt again. I made them all better."

Otis smiled softly. "That all it takes, huh?" He placed his cap back on his head.

"Sure wish I had a hat to cover my head...I hate my hair..." He mumbled, running his hand along his shorn hair.

"Here, kiddo." Otis adjusted the hat so it would fit the boy's head, and plopped it onto him.

"Really?!"

"Sure. I've got a ton of 'em."

"Thank you mister!"

Otis laughed. "Don't you remember her tellin' you my name?"

"...No..." The little boy blushed. "Sorry. I was scared."

"It's okay. It's Otis. Call me Otis."

"Otis." He repeated.

He stayed and talked for a while, until Adi was done with her shift. "Okay, buddy. I'm gonna go."

"Will you come see me again?"

"I can, yeah."

"Can you come back tomorrow?"

Otis turned to Adi, as if asking her. She nodded, smiling. "Yeah. I'll be back tomorrow, buddy."

"Okay...Otis?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I give you a hug? You sure made me feel better today..."

"Okay, buddy. But I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't! I'm used to hurtin' anyways, but you won't hurt me!" He wrapped his frail arms around Otis's neck as the albino bent down to him. "Bye, Otis!"

"By, kiddo."


	3. Chapter 3

As they were leaving, Adi took Otis's hand in hers. "How come it didn't take you that long to open up to him but it took you months to open up to me?"

"We understand each other." Otis answered, smirking and looking at her out of the corner of his eye. Adi dealt him a quick jab in the ribs. "Ow! Hey! I don't know...I...It was just...easy..." He rubbed the back of his neck anxiously. "He's a little kid...What's he gonna do? Already beat to hell...I dunno. I can't explain it..."

"It's okay, babe. I'm proud of you, at any rate. He seemed to really enjoy you. I think you helped him a lot today."

Otis shrugged, watching the numbers tick by on the elevator, until it reached the floor they were on and they stepped onto the car.

"What about you? How're you feelin'?"

"I'm fine." He answered curtly.

"Alright. Alright." She stroked his back gently, scratching three times- their secret language -I. . He winked at her, taking her hand as she let it fall to her side. "Hey, where's your hat?"

"Huh? Oh, I gave it to him. Said he wanted one." Otis shrugged.

"Awww, baby that was so sweet!"

"You say that like you're surprised."

"No. I know you're sweet. It's just almost exclusively with me." She held his hand as they walked to their cars. "Oh! You parked next to me."

"Mm-hm." He grumbled, fiddling with his keys. She pressed herself against the door, smirking. "What...?"

She placed a hand on his cheek and kissed him deeply, pulling him against her.

"I missed you..." She murmured against his lips.

"Been right here the whole time, mama."

They made love for the first time in weeks that night. He wasn't rough and aggressive like he usually was when he controlled the situation, but he was loving and passionate, careful. He rolled off of her, still holding her in his arms and kissing her.

"I love you..." He murmured, pulling her closer.

Again, he traveled in to the hospital around noon, bringing a bag of goodies with him.

"Baby!" Adi trilled excitedly when she saw, him, running into his arms.

"Hey, mama." He kissed her forehead.

"He's really excited to see you today." She chuckled. "Even more so now that you've brought a gift bag."

"Nah, just some odds and ends." He shrugged. "Stuff I would have liked, I guess."

"What, a bunch of crayons and pencils and some white paper?" She snickered.

"...Shut up." He smirked.

They both entered the room, and both were greeted with a smiling little boy in Otis's hat.

"Hey, buddy. How're you feeling today?"

"Better. I don't hurt as much today." He hesitated a moment. "Mister...Doctor Adi said you were sad...Why are you sad?"

"Did she, huh?" Otis glared over his shoulder at her. "Uh...Well, buddy...Remember I told you I never got fixed up and that's why I still hurt sometimes?"

"Yeah?"

"Well...I never got around to fixing my heart, either. So sometimes that hurts too, for the same reason yours does right now. Sometimes the things they did still hurt."

"Oh. I see..." He nodded. "Does that mean my heart will still hurt too?"

"It might, kid. It might. But the thing is to let people know you're hurting when you are, and if you trust them and feel like you can share what happened, why you're hurting. But you don't have to tell them."

"Do you trust Doctor Adi?"

"I do. And I love her very much. But it took me a long, long time to get to that point."

The little boy nodded. "M...My feelings really hurt still..."

"How's that?" Otis asked.

"Well...Mister, can I ask you something?"

"Sure." Otis cocked his head, squinting as the little boy gestured him closer so that he could whisper in his ear. When he was done, Otis sat back down, suddenly solemn. "Yeah, buddy. My parents did that to me too. My dad, anyway."

"It hurts so much..."

"I know. I know it does."

"And it makes me feel so dirty and nasty...

Otis nodded. "It's...not supposed to feel that way."

"Huh?"

Otis sighed. "Buddy, there will be times when someone will undress you and so something similar, and it will feel good. SO good. But it also won't make you feel dirty like that, either. But you should only do that to someone if you really, really love them. Not to hurt them."

"I...I...Okay...I understand, I think." He fidgeted a while, and Otis reached to him, gently stroking his back. He startled, flinching.

"Shhh... What's wrong, kiddo?"

"I...I just hurt..."

"You want me to get Adi-I mean the doctor?"

"No...M...My heart, I mean..."

Otis swallowed heavily. God, if he didn't know what the kid meant by that.

"I just want someone to love me...I see other kids and they don't get treated like I do...Why me?...I...I don't want other kids to hurt like I do, but I want their lives..."

Otis leaned back in his chair, eyes wide, heart pounding. He was staring down his past-self; staring down demons that he had never been able to voice to anyone but Adi, because he had never had anyone. He wanted to be there for this little boy, but the words shook him, took him to a place he readily avoided, but here it was, staring him in the face.

"Mister...Can you show me what it's like to be a normal boy? Can...Can you just hold me a little while?"

"S...Sure, kid. Come here." Otis gently picked him up and sat him on his lap, wrapping his arms around him and stroking his back.

He tried to swallow the lump in his throat, to no avail. God damn...It had been a long time since he'd been reminded of those feelings. Jealousy of other children, the confusion, the self-loathing and blame. He hated himself for still letting his past effect him. And this little boy. What would become of him? Would he be like Otis? Still flinching even as an adult? Or would he man up and grow a fucking pair?

Unable to bottle himself in anymore, Otis sobbed. The little boy drew away from him, staring Otis in the face. Otis turned away, trying to cover up the desperate noises with coughing. The little boy placed a hand on either side of Otis's face and turned his head to face him again, wiping his tears away with tissues he grabbed from his bed stand.

"It's okay, mister. You don't have to be embarrassed to cry in front of me. Me and you have been through the same stuff. I know it's tough." He continued to dab Otis's cheeks dry. "Why're you crying, though? I can help. It'll make me feel better to help you."

"Y...You just...remind me so much of me when I was your age...I...And I wish I had done better. Wish I had gotten away sooner. Wish I had reached out when I should have. Gotten the help that I needed. Maybe I wouldn't be such a fuckin' mess." He sniffed. "Er...Sorry."

"But mister...You're helping me...You're helping me so I don't have to worry about all that stuff, right?"

"Y...Yeah?"

"Doesn't that make you feel better? You're...You're not all messed up...Doctor Adi fixed your heart up, didn't she? I mean...There's some spaces left, but can I fix them?"

Otis chuckled through his tears. "Yeah, buddy. Yeah, you can."

"Okay." He settled on Otis's lap again, wrapping his arms around the albino's neck. Otis wrapped his arms around his thin frame, holding him for a while. "You sure give good hugs, Otis."

"Yeah, that's what Adi says, too."


	4. Chapter 4

Otis again went in to see the frightened little boy.

"Hey, buddy! I brought some stuff for you yesterday, but I forgot them in Adi's office- What's wrong?"

He sat, shaking and crying, his face red and hot from tears. He sniffed, trying to calm himself down when Otis came in.

"S-sorry, m...mister..." He sobbed, bottom lip quivering.

"What's wrong, buddy? What happened?" Otis asked, sitting down in front of him.

"M...My heart r...really hurts today..."

"Oh...Well, that happens sometimes...That's okay."

"I...I hate this..." He sobbed hysterically. "I hate being different from the normal kids! I just want someone to love me! I just want...hugs and kisses and...and...To not be hit or...or..." He glanced at Otis. "L...Like our Daddy's did..."

Otis sighed. "That's...That's called rape, buddy. And listen...I know exactly how you feel. Believe me. Exactly how you feel." Otis reached out and gently stroked his back. He flinched, staring up at him with wide, frightened eyes. "Shhhhh..."

"How...How long was it until you felt love, mister...?"

Otis sighed. "Uhh...I came to my family when I was...23? I think? But...I met Adi when I was 32."

"How old are you now?"

Otis chuckled. "36."

"Maybe...Maybe since I got away when I was younger than you, maybe I won't have to wait so long..."

"Well, little guy...I...Wasn't that smart, either. I wandered on my own for years. I didn't open up to anyone until I almost died. And then I had to because I had no choice...But I...I learned that not everyone is going to hurt you. And not everyone wants something from you for helping you."

He sniffed, wiping his eyes. "I'm sorry I was crying mister..."

Otis laughed. "Don't worry about it. It's okay to do that. I did yesterday, remember?"

"Yeah, but..."

"No buts. It's okay."

"Can...Can you hold me again mister...?"

"Sure thing, bud." Otis gently picked up the boy and held him close.

"Your...these things..." He gently pulled at Otis's side burns. "Tickle a lot!"

"Sorry kiddo."

"It's okay. I think They're cool. They're different."

Otis snorted, stroking his back gently.

"My body also hurts a lot today..."

"Mm...It'll do that. You'll get better though. My girl is a great doctor."

"She's the best! She's so super nice."

"She is."

"She always comes in the morning with a smile on her face and I know I'm gonna be okay because she's here. And she helps me eat my breakfast."

"Didn't she come in this morning?"

"Yeah, but..."

"But what?"

"I had a nightmare last night and...And I was really scared...a-and...And I wet the bed and a nurse had to come change it...I...I was so embarrassed...Dr. Adi kept saying it was okay...But once she left I didn't feel so okay anymore again..."

"Ohh, buddy..."

Tears began to fall down his face again. "I was so embarrassed..."

"I bet...It's okay. Things like that happen. Kids do that stuff all the time. It's no big deal."

"It...It was a nightmare about my parents..."

Otis sighed. "Yeah, I still get those too..."

"So...they'll never stop?"

"They might. Adi has really, really helped me. I still have them, but they're not as bad and not as often."

He nodded. "Okay...Can...Can you just hold me a little while?"

"Yeah. Go ahead. get comfortable." He waited until the boy had finished fidgeting and then rested his arm on his back.

After a while, he dozed off in Otis's arms, the fist clinging to his shirt slowly releasing the fabric.

Otis smiled softly. He would be willing to bet after he had had his little accident, he was too upset to go to sleep, and had exhausted himself crying. He felt a familiar hand stroking his hair and leaned into her touch.

"Hey, mama." He whispered.

"Is he asleep?" Adi asked.

"Mm-hm. Been for a little while now. He's been a little fussy today...Didn't have a very good night last night."

"No...I know...He was so upset..." She sighed, shaking her head. "I brought us lunch."

Otis eyed her suspiciously. He had been having problems lately, and didn't want to face them. "Can't eat. My hands are occupied."

"I got you soup. I can feed you."

"No."

"Otis..."

"I'll eat later."

"Okay..." She relented. She did have to marvel, though, at the site of Otis holding a child. He could be so tender and sweet when he wanted to be. That tenderness was usually only directed at her- but he was blessing this little boy with it, too. "Uhm...Here's his...his bear you brought him..." She said, placing it on his chest gently.

"Thanks. He'll be tickled when he wakes up."

"Otis. I heard you this morning."

"Heard me what?"

"Puking."

"I'm fine..."

"I'm sure you are." She deadpanned.

"I've been through this again and again, Adi. I'll be fine..."

The little boy began to stir in Otis's arms, whimpering and fidgeting.

"Shhhh..." Otis murmured.

His eyes flew open and he jerked away form Otis to look him in the face, trembling.

"Hey...It's just me. It's just me."

He sighed in relief, glancing at Adi. "H...Hi Dr. Adi."

"Hi, sweetie." She smiled. "Have you been taking good care of my man?" She asked.

"I think so..." He murmured.

"How about we color some, huh?" Otis stirred, sitting the boy back on his bed.

"What?" He cocked his head.

"color. I brought you some coloring books and some crayons. Even some white paper if you just want to draw. Pencils, too."

"Mister...Why'd you do all this for me? That's...that's so nice!" He asked, tears running down his face.

Otis chuckled and wiped his tears away. "Because I can. And I wanted to. No one did it for me when I was a kid, and I wanted to show you what it's like to be a normal little boy. Okay? So come on. Relax and enjoy it with me, yeah?"

He nodded.

"I'm on my lunch break. Mind if I join you boys?"

"Oh, please Dr. Adi! Please please please?"

She giggled. "Of course. Give me some paper, Otis!"

Adi and Otis sketched while the little boy colored happily in his book. He had been beyond excited when Otis pulled out the supplies.

"What're you drawin', mama?" Otis asked. It wasn't often that she had time to draw, but Adi's skills rivaled Otis's.

"You." She answered simply.

"What? Really?"

"Yeah." She showed him her paper, now filled with a portrait of him smiling softly.

"That's not me. That guys too good looking for it to be me."

"That's what you look like, baby." She stated simply. "What're you drawing?"

"You." He smirked.

"What color are these, Mister?" The little boy asked Otis, pointing to a cat.

"Whatever color you want them to be." Otis shrugged.

"Can kitties look like you do?"

"Huh? Whaddya mean?"

"All white with red eyes like that."

"Yeah, why?"

"Because it'll be my mister Otis kitty! So when you're not here at least I can still have that to remind me of you!"

Otis sighed, shaking his head and smiling.


	5. Chapter 5

Adi actually convinced Otis to eat dinner with the rest of the family that night. She was so proud of him overcoming his demons and forcing food down. She stayed down with the family while he worked on a piece he had started days before.

When she began to climb the stairs, she heard him retching. Her heart sunk as she threw open the bathroom door to see him on his knees in front of the toilet.

"You're fucking kidding me." She sighed.

He coughed, sputtering her name as she left the room again. She heard him cleaning himself up and then his footsteps behind her.

"Otis, what is going on with you?"

"Adi, I'm just...Having a hard time, I'm...I'm gonna be okay."

"That's fucking great and all but you won't TALK to me! I'm trying to help you because I love you and I hate seeing you like this but you won't TELL ME what's going on! Every time I ask it's 'I'm just working through some shit' or 'I'll figure it out'. You're so disgusted with yourself but you won't tell anyone WHY so they can help tell you NOT to be. TALK to me, Otis!"

"I worked it out on my own before!"

"Yeah, and look where you are again! LOOK. You're not better. You're not GETTING better. You're right back where you were circling the fucking drain over and over again. You're fucking LYING to yourself! Why?! Why are you hanging onto this shit?! By not getting help you're only hurting yourself, Otis. Because you'll never fix it on your own. EVER. You. Need. Help."

"Is that fucking it? You fucking think I'm crazy now? That I need a psych-"

"YOU ARE FUCKING CRAZY OTIS! You fucking KILL people because of what your Mom and Dad did to you years ago! They'll never be hurt the way they hurt you! You not eating or purging or hurting someone isn't going to make them care! And it's CERTAINLY not going to fix what they did to you. And it's CERTAINLY not going to fix our marriage."

"F...Fix our marriage...?"

"Do you think I LIKE us like this?! You constantly pushing me away and pushing me away because you're dealing with things that you don't WANT to deal with and you won't let me HELP you so you push me away! I'm your fucking WIFE, Otis. I have been there for you through EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING. And you can't fucking tell me what you're going through right now? Because it's too hard for you to think about? Or talk about? I don't want to BE this way!"

She stopped for a moment to gauge his reaction. His eyes held so much anguish she couldn't look at him. He was frozen in place, staring at her, waiting for her to continue.

"You...You can't keep doing this, Otis."

"I...I need to leave...I-I..."

"That's it, run away from your fucking problems like you always do!"

"FUCK you, Adi! Jesus christ did you ever fucking think for ONE second, one GODDAMNED second that I might be afraid of telling you because I didn't want you to fucking leave me?! Did you ever think that?! No you just...You just keep goin' and goin' and you don't stop to think about how much HUMILIATION and SHAME I still feel! You just think you can solve the world's fuckin' problems, the greatest surgeon who ever lived can fix ANYTHING! And if she can't, one of her condescending doctor friends, CAN! FUCK YOU!" He slammed the door, stomping down the stairs and slamming the front door.

She sighed, running a hand through her hair. He would come back when he had cooled down. Then she could talk to him. She curled up in their bed, knowing he would wake her when he came home.

When she woke up and he hadn't come home, she immediately drove to where she knew he would be- his lookout spot.

Sure enough, there he was, crumpled on the ground, two empty bottles of Jack among puddles of what she assumed to be vomit. Sighing, she drug him into her car and threw him in, driving him to the hospital, dropping him off with one of her colleagues before she went about her rounds.

The little boy sat on his bed, watching cartoons on the television.

"Hi, Dr. Adi!" He greeted her with a big smile that slowly fell from his face. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing sweetie. I just came to check on you today."

"Is Mr. Otis coming?"

"No, honey. I don't think so."

"Why?...Did...Did I do something wrong? Is it because I wet the bed?"

"Oh, no sweetheart. He's...He's uh..." She sighed. "I'll be honest with you. What's wrong is we...We had a fight and he did something stupid and he's in the emergency room right now."

"Oh no! Is he going to be okay?"

"He'll be fine, sweetie. I'm just worried about him."

"What...What were you fighting about?"

"He hasn't eaten in days and he won't tell me why. His heart is hurting and he won't let me help him."

"Oh..."

"I'm sorry, honey I shouldn't have said anything..."

"Can I go see him later? When he's better?"

"Huh? I...I guess...Sure, honey."

"He always makes me feel better. Maybe I can make him feel better, too."

"Yeah. I think that's a good idea, honey."

After her rounds, she went back to the ER to check on Otis.

"Hey, Adi. Any idea what happened with your man or just...Trying to figure that out, too."

"He hasn't eaten in days, and he's refusing to eat. Tube him."

"Y...You sure?"

"Yes. We're going to talk when he wakes up. Is he stable otherwise?"

"He's really dehydrated and he hit his head pretty good. Good enough to get a few stitches but other than that-"

"Oh god you didn't have to shave part of his head did you?"

"No, why?"

"He would flip shit...And I know he's already going to be pissed."

"Okay...As long as you're sure..."

"Tube him." She walked away, speaking over her shoulder. "I'll come to his room when you put him in one."

Another hour passed before Otis came around, grimacing at the pain in his head.

"Sweetheart..." Adi murmured, taking his hand.

"Nn...Adi...?" He groaned. "Where am I?"

"In the hospital, love."

"Why? What happened?"

"You went to your lookout spot last night after we fought. You passed out and apparently hit your head."

"We had a fight?" He asked.

"Don't you remember?"

"No..."

"Oh, sweetheart..." She kissed his forehead.

"My head is pounding..."

"I'm sure, baby. You clocked it pretty good. Had to get a couple stitches."

"Nn...What'd we fight about, Adi? I don't remember..."

"We don't need to talk about it right now, sweetie. Your head hurts. Just close your eyes."

Otis closed his eyes and drifted back to sleep for another few hours. Adi left to check on a few more patients, and when she returned, he was awake.

"Hey, mama."

"Hey, babe. How's your head?"

"Much better...Not thumpin' anymore."

"Good." She kissed him lightly.

"I...Remember what we were fighting about."

"Oh, yeah?" She bit her lip.

"Yeah...We uh...We both said some really nasty things..."

"Yeah...We did. But...I'm still pissed at you."

"Adi-"

"No, Otis. You landed yourself in the hospital. How much more do you want to tell me it's not a problem? I would never, EVER leave you because of something that happened to you. EVER. That's so...Fucking stupid of you to think that I would. I love you, you fucking moron. I would never leave you because of something horrible you went through."

"I just...Sometimes it's really hard for me to talk about and...I..."

"I know it is. But you not eating isn't going to fix anything. You starving yourself and abusing yourself isn't going to fix anything."

"I'm sorry..." He mumbled, moving his hand to his face., then puling away, alarmed. "What the FUCK is that?!"

"A feeding tube. You weren't eating. You were refusing to eat. There ya go."

He growled. "Adi...Get this OUT."

"No. Not until you fix your shit."

"ADI." He growled again, his voice breaking. "Why are you doing this to me?!"

"Because you're KILLING yourself, Otis! And I love you too much to let you!"

"I KNOW how long I can go!"

"Otis..." Tears ran down her cheeks. "Otis I don't WANT you to! It's...Its so dangerous...Baby please listen to me. This isn't healthy. This isn't good. You can't keep doing this to yourself, or I'm not going to have an Otis. Please...Stop. Talk to me. You know I'll never leave you..."

He balled his fists. "Goddammit I'm so fucking mad at you..."

"You can be mad all you want because I'm not letting you do this anymore. You need to fix yourself because if you die, I don't know what I'll do."

"I...I don't want to tell you what's been going on..." He spoke with acid in his voice. "Because I don't want to hurt you."

"You don't want to hurt me?! What the fuck do you think this is doing, Otis?!"

He hung his head as Adi left, going to check on the little boy.

"How's Mr. Otis?"

"He's alright. He's stable and he's going to be fine."

"When can I see him?"

"We'll go down in a minute, buddy. OKay?"

"Okay. I can't wait to make him feel better!"

She smiled softly, even though she was mad at Otis, she still loved him to death.


	6. Chapter 6

Adi visited Otis once more before bringing his little therapist down just to make sure he wasn't in too foul of a mood.

She cautiously opened the door to his room. He was sleeping or resting his eyes- she could never be sure. She shook him gently. "Sweetie?"

"Hn?" He startled awake, turning to her. "Adi...?" He rubbed his eyes.

"Yeah, baby. It's me. You still mad at me?"

"Yes." He answered frankly.

"I figu-whoa."

"What?"

"Your eyes are so bloodshot..."

"Yeah...Uh...I was dry-heaving pretty hard...They uh...They gave me something for nausea. I don't know what it was..."

"Zofran?"

"I don't know. Sounds right. Will it make you drowsy too?" He asked. She nodded in answer.

"Why were you dry-heaving?" She asked stroking his hair.

He sighed. "Nervous."

"Why, sweetie?"

"We're fighting...I hate fighting with you."

"Honey..." She sat down next to him on the bed, taking his face in her hands. "I'm not going anywhere. Just because we've been arguing doesn't mean I don't love you. In fact, we're arguing because I want to be CLOSER to you. I understand you're afraid to tell me about what you're going through. But I want you to tell me. I want you to be able to tell me anything."

He sighed. "I...I thought about it and...I...I think I'm ready to tell you."

"Okay, sweetie. Go ahead." She took his hand. "I'm here for you."

"I...I started having flashbacks and...I just...I didn't...Want to be touched...And...How fucking shameful is that that I don't want my own wife to touch me because I'm so...stuck in the past? Fucking...A man who doesn't even want to be touched by his wife..." He shook his head.

"What were your flashbacks about...?"

He hesitated for a while. "M...My mom."

"What about her?"

"I...There...were only a few times that I remember her hurting me like dad...She...She did...and I..." He shuddered. "It was so...so disgusting..."

"Sweetie..."

"She was so fucking...dirty and she stunk, oh my god... When she made me eat her out it was..." He gagged.

"Okay, stop. You're going to make yourself sick again. Stop it."

He composed himself, pausing a moment. "But...I...I love you touching me...and the affection and sugar you give me...Ain't nothin' like it...I-I...It's just...So embarrassing to not want to be touched by your own wife because of what your mother did to you. And to not be able to be on the bottom because of her..."

"Honey, nothing you have gone through could make me love you less. It doesn't change anything about you...I really wish you would have told me instead of suffering like this...It wasn't worth it..."

"I could have gone a few more days without eating. Didn't have to fuckin' tube me."

"You're still mad about that?"

"Pissed. Absolutely pissed."

"Well, too bad. Because it's staying in a few more days and so are you."

"The fuck I am!"

"You're dehydrated and starved. They're keeping you over night for observation, at any rate."

"Adi, goddamn you."

"Yeah, I knew you would say that. Here's the thing though: I don't care if you're pissed off at me, because I still HAVE a fucking husband. I might not have if I would have let you go much longer, asshole."

He scoffed. "I've gone much longer without eating."

"Yeah, but your body was used to it then. It's not anymore, and I don't ever want you to get used to it again." She growled. "God, Otis I could kick the shit out of you right now."

"Mm." He grunted.

"You're so goddamn stubborn." She sighed. "But I guess that's what's kept you around...I love you so much, but I just wish you would listen. Do you have any idea how INFURIATING you can be?!"

He crossed his arms over his chest, staring her down.

"Don't. DO NOT look at me like that Otis B. Driftwood. Because right now I'm stuck between being SO mad at you and feeling so bad for what happened to you and I can't figure out my own emotions."

"Get this fuckin' tube out of me."

"Are you gonna eat? Without purging? And without me constantly following you around? And don't even answer, because I know you won't because you're still upset."

"Why are you punishing me for being abused?!"

Before Adi could stop herself, she felt her hand make contact with his cheek. His head spun with the impact. His eyes turned to inferno as he glared at her, biting the inside of his lip.

"How. DARE you." Here voice shook as she spoke. " I love you. I love you more than anything. All I wanted was for you to talk to me. I understand that's hard for you. But I love you. There is nothing. That would change that. And you know that. How. Dare you say that."

There was a definite fire in Otis's eyes that didn't waver, and it worried Adi what he would do if he wasn't in a hospital bed at the moment. There would definitely have been broken glass.

"Wipe that furious look off your face, because he's coming to see you."

"Who."

"The little boy. He doesn't have a name either, asshole."

Otis paused for a moment, gritting his teeth.

"Drop the act. I know you're more upset than angry right now. And I know you're scared." She sat down on the bed beside him, gently caressing his face where she had slapped him moments before. He still glared at her. "I'm sorry I slapped you. You just...hit a nerve. I'm only trying to help you. Maybe it's selfish. Maybe I just want to keep you around for me. But I don't want to lose you, Otis, and you're scaring me.

The intensity in his eyes faded and his face softened. "Go get the kid. He's probably wondering where you are."

She smiled softly, kissing him on the forehead before she left.

The boy sat happily in the wheelchair as she steered him to Otis's room. It hadn't been long since she had left him, but he was dozing lightly again.

"Ohh, Mr. Otis is asleep..."

"It's okay to wake him. He won't mind."

"You do it, Dr. Adi..."

"Okay." She giggled, gently shaking her husband. "Sweetie. You have a visitor."

"Hnn?"

"Hi, Mr. Otis."

"Heyyyy buddy." Otis pat the bed for him to sit down with him. Adi helped him up, letting him settle. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay, Mister. What about you? You're the one who's sick now!"

"Ah, I'm alright buddy. I'm gonna be fine. Just gotta get myself sorted out."

"Doctor Adi said it was because you were sad..."

"Er...Well-"

"What did you do to yourself...?"

Otis glanced at Adi, sighing. "My parents always told me I was fat. And that's why they didn't love me. That if I was skinnier they would love me. That gets stuck in my head sometimes on repeat, like a broken record. So I didn't eat for a while and I ended up hurting myself."

"Mister that's not true! You know that they said isn't true you told me yourself!"

"I know, buddy. But remember I told you I didn't let anyone help me for a long time and it's hurt me? Sometimes it's easier for me to tell people than to listen to my own advice."

"It's not true mister. Nothing they said about you is true."

Otis chuckled slightly. "Thanks, buddy."


End file.
